35 Times and Counting...

In my few 30 years here on Earth, I have moved approximately 35 times and somehow, it seems like I'm still counting.  That obviously is nothing new.  We moved alot when I was a child as well.  My parents have always loved to "fix" houses and sell them...Im sure if I asked them how much money they made doing this, it's crazy!  We were either "fixing" a new house or being transferred with my dad's job. 

One particular time I do not remember was a move when I was 18 months old.  We were moving into a new house to us, but an old house to the elderly man moving out.  He had a heart condition that required medication and this day was move-in day for us.  Mom said she cleaned the entire house before we started moving in and my older sister and I played around the house while the adults moved us in. 

Somehow, being the adventurous person I still am- I came across a pretty little piece of "candy" which happened to be a heart pill that belonged the elderly man before us.  I guess it was hidden in the carpet and I was the shortest distance to the ground... so I ate it.  ( I still LOVE candy...not sure if its because its so pretty- or because its so YUMMY!)

Mom and Dad came around the corner to see their 18 month old little girl DEAD on the floor. 

That was ME.  They rushed me to the hospital and my heart was stopped for 28 minutes.  Any of you in the medical field can only imagine the hope of a normal life my parents were promised...or lack there of.  All of the doctors told my parents there was nothing more they could do...I was gone.  Mom said one doctor stayed in that room and worked on me.  She saw him in the there.  A few moments later my heart began to pump again and that doctor walked out and never spoke to anyone.  She asked the other doctors who that doctor was and they were all convinced there was no one in the room with me.  She believes in angels to this day! So do I. 

After the incident, I was unable to speak, sit up, walk, feed myself, or anything for that matter.  I was a vegetable lying in a bed completely dependant as if I was newborn all over again.  Only this time, with no hope from anyone of getting much better.  My parents were told I would not read past a Kindergarten reading level- EVER!  My social skills would probably not develop normally and my body may not function correctly due to the lack of oxygen for so long. 

And here I am...I have a Kindergartner and a 2nd grader that I excel far above in reading...and math...and social skills.  I do believe God had a bigger plan.  This incident did cause some physical and social and mental hardships throughout my life that I will speak of in future posts, but there is never a day I can complain about the accomplishments God has placed before me. 

Because of events like this when I was young, and even recent incidents that we may question God's purpose, I know His plan is ALWAYS better than OURS! My youth minister, whom I shall keep his name silent, used to tell us if you're always driving looking in the rear view mirror, you're bound to crash moving forward!  From that day on, every day was a challenge, and to this day I struggle some days in some ways- but I choose to think of it like this.... If I was "normal" or "perfect" or "predictable", I wouldn't be God's workmanship!  He is making me into the person He wants me to be.  I am a tool for Him.  My life is a gateway He will use to get others to Him. All I have to do is be moldable, vulnerable, and teachable.  I must wake up every day and say, "Get behind me Satan" because Satan is real and he knows my weaknesses.  He knows that I get frustrated when I physically can not remember things, when I can't focus, and when I get self-conscience about my past.  I choose daily to remind Satan he looses in the end!  He is already defeated and I stand on the opposite side, in the name of Jesus Christ- whom my soul loves!

I honestly believe if we do not stand up against the evils in this world- including Satan himself- we are truly giving ourselves over to the weakness of our sinful nature.  There is a quote I remember, "You have to stand for SOMETHING or you will fall for anything..." Im not sure who said this, but it is quoted all over the place. God's Word tells us to "STAND FIRM" Ephesians 6:13 ...I am thankful I can stand.  I am thankful that I can breathe and most of all- I am thankful my God saw me as WORTH IT to die for me.

I can not exactly answer WHY God chose to send me back to Earth that day, and no I never saw a light or a tunnel or do I remember sitting on Jesus' lap, but one thing I do know to be true, and that is God has a purpose for my life- whether that is big or small- and I am here to allow Him to fullfill that purpose through this ONE life- whatever that may be.